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tikificTitle: The Steadfast Plush Elephant (Mythklok Interstitial)
Author: tikistitch
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Mythklok mutates with Toy Story?
Warnings: Swearing
Notes: These characters were sort of Tam's idea. Ah, hell, they were probably mostly Tam's idea.
Elias gestured frantically past the end of his little bed. Charles frowned and then, rising from where he was sitting beside his son, went to retrieve some well-loved plush toys from the far end of the nursery.
"Ya know," said Charles, returning to sit down on the edge of Elias' bed, "What I wonder is, if these are your best friends in the whole wide world, how the hell do they always end up on the other side of the room?"
"Lelefun! Wunge!" cried Elias, now grabbing his friends from his father and enveloping them in a very tight hug.
"OK. Well. All ready for bed now, sport?"
Elias nodded and muttered a muffled "Night-night,” from beneath layers of fur and stuffing.
"Night-night," replied Charles, pausing to kiss what was visible of the tangle of dark hair before rising and turning off the light. He gently closed the door. Soon there was no sound but a surprisingly loud little snore.
"Well, that was another jolly good day, I'd say!" declared the plush elephant as he carefully extricated himself from they boy's grasp. “Wouldn't you say, friend Wunge?”
"Lelefun!" cried the angel. "Can you gimme a hand? He's fucking squooshing me tonight."
Carefully grasping the small boy's hand with his trunk, Lelefun pried the angel loose with a great tug. "There we go!" he said.
"Shit!" said Wunge, who had just landed on his soft angel bottom. "I need a candy cigarette. Did you see where he left the pack?" He dusted himself off and started walking towards the end of the bed.
"Wunge! You know sugar is not good for you, my dear!" cautioned Lelefun.
"Eh. It's better than when those creepy twins smeared us with peanut butter."
"Now, we are all cleaned up from that little adventure."
"''Cause their fucking mom threw us in the washing machine! My tummy stuffing is still damp! Oh, there we go!" Wunge pointed across the room, to the little bureau set by the wall. “I see candy!”
“What are you doing, dear?”
“Duh, Lelefun! I'm gonna flap my angelic fucking wings and fly over and grab the smokes,” said the little angel, fluttering his fluffy pink wings.
“But we know from past experience that your stuffed wings are aerodynamically ineffective.”
“Hmpf! I need sugar!” And with that, the little angel hurled himself off the end of the bed, towards the tempting stash of candy sitting atop the bureau. Unfortunately, his wings did not seem to provide much lift, so after smacking onto the edge of the bureau, the little angel tumbled downwards, falling with a small muffled thud on the carpet.
“Wunge! My dear! Are you all right?” inquired Lelefun. He slipped off the edge of the bed, holding on with just his trunk, and thereby gracefully swung down to the floor to stand above his dazed colleague. “Are you well? I am a doctor, you know!”
“You're not a doctor!” declared Wunge, shaking his head. “You're a plush elephant!”
“I am a doctor of fluffology specializing in jiggery pokery,” insisted Lelefun, poking the angel experimentally with his trunk.
“I'm fine. And I even grabbed a smoke!” bragged Wunge, holding up a tiny candy cigarette.
“Smoking is bad for you, dear!”
“Hey, what's this?” asked the angel, seeing a tiny pink high heeled shoe poking out from underneath the bedspread at the foot of Elias's bed. He raised the spread, and he and Lelefun peeked underneath.
“It's so pink!” observed Lelefun.
“And sparkly!” marvelled Wunge.
Suddenly, the inert object sprung to life.
“Ow!” said Lelefun, who had just been whacked on the head.
“I'm Pretty Pretty Princess!” declared the new toy, raising her plastic sword high.
“Why the fuck did you hit me?” complained Wunge.
“Smoking is BAD!” she declared.
“I've told you, dear,” Lelefun sighed.
“So is getting hit on the fucking head!” grumbled Wunge. “And that was my last one!” he wailed, looking at his broken candy.
“Hello, Miss Princess,” said Lelefun. “I am Lelefun, Doctor of Fluffology, and this is my dear colleague, Wunge.”
“I go shopping and make fun of girls who are less fashionably dressed than me!” Pretty Pretty Princess told them. “Wanna talk about clothes?”
“Oh, that sounds delightful!” agreed Lelefun.
“That sounds BORING,” Wunge told her. Pretty Pretty Princess raised her sword again.
"Now, now I don't think we need to resort to fisticuffs," cautioned Lelefun.
"She started it," muttered Wunge. "Now I got low blood sugar 'cause of her!"
"I rather doubt that's possible, dear, as you lack a circulatory system. So, to what do we owe the honor of your visit, dear Princess?"
"Oh, my kid threw me under there," she said, pointing under the bed with her sword. "She wants to come back and visit Boon. 'Cause she loooooves him."
"EWWWWWW, gross!" sputtered Wunge.
"She wants to MARRY him," grinned the Princess, her smile blinding and white. "And then they'll KISS!"
"AAAAARRRRRGH! Girl germs! Girl germs!" wailed the now hysterical Wunge.
"Now, my dearest, there is no need to shout. You will truly wake our boy!"
"Hee, your friend is the excitable type," the Princess told Lelefun.
"Well it has been scientifically proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that girls have cooties," Lelefun crisply informed her.
"Oh, has it now?" asked the Princess, scowling while she continued to grin.
"Yes. And there is no arguing with science!"
"Huh. So, how about this, Trunky?" she asked, whirling around and suddenly giving a very surprised Wunge a big smooch on the cheek.
"Aiiiiii!" cried the anguished angel, who turned fluffy white and fainted dead away.
"Wait!" said Lelefun. "Someone is coming!" He and Princess quite suddenly dropped to the floor, inert, just as Elias' door quietly opened and two whispering adults crept in.
"I swear to god she does this on purpose," Raziel told Charles.
"You see it?"
"Yeah, here she is, right out on the floor!" said Raziel, retrieving the Princess.
"That's weird. I didn't see it here before. And how did these guys get all the way down there?" asked Charles, picking up Lelefun and Wunge. “I just tucked him in with them!”
"He must thrash in his sleep. Probably dreaming of whacking demons or something," grinned Raziel. She paused and gave Elias a quick kiss. "Thanks, Sariel," she said, waving the Princess. And then she disappeared.
"Hum. Well, take my advice," Charles whispered, nestling Lelefun and Wunge once again close to his son. "You might wanna keep these guys close. They are your best friends and all."
As he left, there came a tiny voice. "Lelefun!"
"What is it, my dear?"
"I have girl cooties! I'm gone DIIIIIIE!"
"That's all right, I will give you an inoculation!" Lelefun reached over with his trunk and gave Wunge a quick peck on the cheek.
"Oh! Thank you, Lelefun! Thank gods you're a doctor! It would have been a painful death! A terrible death!"
"That's all right, dear. I am always here for you."
"And you know something else?"
"What's that?"
"We need to get a fucking sword! In case that Princess chick comes back and wants to kiss us again!”
"Well, there's always cootie inoculation."
"That's true! You better inoculate him too! He had a girl kiss him! I saw her."
"All right," said Lelefun, giving Elias a trunk kiss. The boy giggled in his sleep.
“And, uh. Inoculate me again? Just to make sure!”
“Very well, my dear,” said Lelefun, smiling an elephant smile and giving Wunge another kiss.
"Phew! G'night Lelefun."
"Good night my dear. Sleep tight."
Author: tikistitch
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Mythklok mutates with Toy Story?
Warnings: Swearing
Notes: These characters were sort of Tam's idea. Ah, hell, they were probably mostly Tam's idea.
Elias gestured frantically past the end of his little bed. Charles frowned and then, rising from where he was sitting beside his son, went to retrieve some well-loved plush toys from the far end of the nursery.
"Ya know," said Charles, returning to sit down on the edge of Elias' bed, "What I wonder is, if these are your best friends in the whole wide world, how the hell do they always end up on the other side of the room?"
"Lelefun! Wunge!" cried Elias, now grabbing his friends from his father and enveloping them in a very tight hug.
"OK. Well. All ready for bed now, sport?"
Elias nodded and muttered a muffled "Night-night,” from beneath layers of fur and stuffing.
"Night-night," replied Charles, pausing to kiss what was visible of the tangle of dark hair before rising and turning off the light. He gently closed the door. Soon there was no sound but a surprisingly loud little snore.
"Well, that was another jolly good day, I'd say!" declared the plush elephant as he carefully extricated himself from they boy's grasp. “Wouldn't you say, friend Wunge?”
"Lelefun!" cried the angel. "Can you gimme a hand? He's fucking squooshing me tonight."
Carefully grasping the small boy's hand with his trunk, Lelefun pried the angel loose with a great tug. "There we go!" he said.
"Shit!" said Wunge, who had just landed on his soft angel bottom. "I need a candy cigarette. Did you see where he left the pack?" He dusted himself off and started walking towards the end of the bed.
"Wunge! You know sugar is not good for you, my dear!" cautioned Lelefun.
"Eh. It's better than when those creepy twins smeared us with peanut butter."
"Now, we are all cleaned up from that little adventure."
"''Cause their fucking mom threw us in the washing machine! My tummy stuffing is still damp! Oh, there we go!" Wunge pointed across the room, to the little bureau set by the wall. “I see candy!”
“What are you doing, dear?”
“Duh, Lelefun! I'm gonna flap my angelic fucking wings and fly over and grab the smokes,” said the little angel, fluttering his fluffy pink wings.
“But we know from past experience that your stuffed wings are aerodynamically ineffective.”
“Hmpf! I need sugar!” And with that, the little angel hurled himself off the end of the bed, towards the tempting stash of candy sitting atop the bureau. Unfortunately, his wings did not seem to provide much lift, so after smacking onto the edge of the bureau, the little angel tumbled downwards, falling with a small muffled thud on the carpet.
“Wunge! My dear! Are you all right?” inquired Lelefun. He slipped off the edge of the bed, holding on with just his trunk, and thereby gracefully swung down to the floor to stand above his dazed colleague. “Are you well? I am a doctor, you know!”
“You're not a doctor!” declared Wunge, shaking his head. “You're a plush elephant!”
“I am a doctor of fluffology specializing in jiggery pokery,” insisted Lelefun, poking the angel experimentally with his trunk.
“I'm fine. And I even grabbed a smoke!” bragged Wunge, holding up a tiny candy cigarette.
“Smoking is bad for you, dear!”
“Hey, what's this?” asked the angel, seeing a tiny pink high heeled shoe poking out from underneath the bedspread at the foot of Elias's bed. He raised the spread, and he and Lelefun peeked underneath.
“It's so pink!” observed Lelefun.
“And sparkly!” marvelled Wunge.
Suddenly, the inert object sprung to life.
“Ow!” said Lelefun, who had just been whacked on the head.
“I'm Pretty Pretty Princess!” declared the new toy, raising her plastic sword high.
“Why the fuck did you hit me?” complained Wunge.
“Smoking is BAD!” she declared.
“I've told you, dear,” Lelefun sighed.
“So is getting hit on the fucking head!” grumbled Wunge. “And that was my last one!” he wailed, looking at his broken candy.
“Hello, Miss Princess,” said Lelefun. “I am Lelefun, Doctor of Fluffology, and this is my dear colleague, Wunge.”
“I go shopping and make fun of girls who are less fashionably dressed than me!” Pretty Pretty Princess told them. “Wanna talk about clothes?”
“Oh, that sounds delightful!” agreed Lelefun.
“That sounds BORING,” Wunge told her. Pretty Pretty Princess raised her sword again.
"Now, now I don't think we need to resort to fisticuffs," cautioned Lelefun.
"She started it," muttered Wunge. "Now I got low blood sugar 'cause of her!"
"I rather doubt that's possible, dear, as you lack a circulatory system. So, to what do we owe the honor of your visit, dear Princess?"
"Oh, my kid threw me under there," she said, pointing under the bed with her sword. "She wants to come back and visit Boon. 'Cause she loooooves him."
"EWWWWWW, gross!" sputtered Wunge.
"She wants to MARRY him," grinned the Princess, her smile blinding and white. "And then they'll KISS!"
"AAAAARRRRRGH! Girl germs! Girl germs!" wailed the now hysterical Wunge.
"Now, my dearest, there is no need to shout. You will truly wake our boy!"
"Hee, your friend is the excitable type," the Princess told Lelefun.
"Well it has been scientifically proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that girls have cooties," Lelefun crisply informed her.
"Oh, has it now?" asked the Princess, scowling while she continued to grin.
"Yes. And there is no arguing with science!"
"Huh. So, how about this, Trunky?" she asked, whirling around and suddenly giving a very surprised Wunge a big smooch on the cheek.
"Aiiiiii!" cried the anguished angel, who turned fluffy white and fainted dead away.
"Wait!" said Lelefun. "Someone is coming!" He and Princess quite suddenly dropped to the floor, inert, just as Elias' door quietly opened and two whispering adults crept in.
"I swear to god she does this on purpose," Raziel told Charles.
"You see it?"
"Yeah, here she is, right out on the floor!" said Raziel, retrieving the Princess.
"That's weird. I didn't see it here before. And how did these guys get all the way down there?" asked Charles, picking up Lelefun and Wunge. “I just tucked him in with them!”
"He must thrash in his sleep. Probably dreaming of whacking demons or something," grinned Raziel. She paused and gave Elias a quick kiss. "Thanks, Sariel," she said, waving the Princess. And then she disappeared.
"Hum. Well, take my advice," Charles whispered, nestling Lelefun and Wunge once again close to his son. "You might wanna keep these guys close. They are your best friends and all."
As he left, there came a tiny voice. "Lelefun!"
"What is it, my dear?"
"I have girl cooties! I'm gone DIIIIIIE!"
"That's all right, I will give you an inoculation!" Lelefun reached over with his trunk and gave Wunge a quick peck on the cheek.
"Oh! Thank you, Lelefun! Thank gods you're a doctor! It would have been a painful death! A terrible death!"
"That's all right, dear. I am always here for you."
"And you know something else?"
"What's that?"
"We need to get a fucking sword! In case that Princess chick comes back and wants to kiss us again!”
"Well, there's always cootie inoculation."
"That's true! You better inoculate him too! He had a girl kiss him! I saw her."
"All right," said Lelefun, giving Elias a trunk kiss. The boy giggled in his sleep.
“And, uh. Inoculate me again? Just to make sure!”
“Very well, my dear,” said Lelefun, smiling an elephant smile and giving Wunge another kiss.
"Phew! G'night Lelefun."
"Good night my dear. Sleep tight."
