DethPink (Mythklok Interstitial)
May. 24th, 2011 10:14 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tikificTitle: DethPink (Mythklok Interstitial)
Author: tikistitch
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Kids and toys
Warnings: Slash, AU, OCs, swearing, lots and lots and lots of pink. With sparklies!
Notes: I dunno, have you been to the little girls toy aisle lately?
"BOOOOOO!" howled Abby.
The squealing dark-haired girl tackled Elias with a monstrous hug. However, thanks to both extended wings and two sets of arms flapping, the small boy managed to remain more or less standing under the assault. And then he recovered himself enough to favor his intended bride (well, in a decade or two) with a rather gooey kiss.
"Ewwwwww!" commented Raziel, Abby's mother.
Liam, Abby's fair haired twin brother, merely giggled at the stupidity of his young playmates. He had cleverly run directly to Uncle Ganesh, who inevitably lifted him upside-down. And, as all know who are of a certain age, upside down is totally awesome.
"Sariel, you know if they mix their angel baby germs, you'll probably get MUTANT angel baby germs!" Raziel, a student of biochemistry, explained.
"It's her fault!" Charles protested. "Your spawn is a wanton woman!"
"Come along," boomed Wotan, scooping up the young lovers, one in each arm. "I'm hungry as hell, and we've got fresh Vritra meat on the grill. And vegetarian lasagna," he noted, eying Ganesh.
"Oh! Made with that cream sauce?" Ganesh inquired as they packed several squirming children inside.
Charles, who was chronically peckish, but no fan of legendary monster snake meat, broiled or otherwise, paused for a moment to stoop over and pick up his son's beloved elephant plush toy, cruelly abandoned in the melee caused by his evil niece. He glanced at Abby's toy, which also lay forgotten on the ground. Curious, he carefully gripped it between thumb and forefinger, as one might hold a smallpox-infected blanket.
"What is this thing anyway?" he asked Raziel, who stood watching.
"Pretty Pretty Princess? Oh, gods, it's horrible. Abby won't go anywhere without it."
"But, what is it?"
"It's a princess fairly angel ... uh, ballet dancer. I think."
"It's so .... pink!"
"Yeah."
"What's the point?"
"Well, she has a magical pastel rainbow Pegasus pony...."
"Wait! The fucking pony flies too? I thought she was a fucking fairy?"
"A fairy angel. A magical fairy angel."
"Yeah, I guess it would fucking suck to be one of those non-magical fairy angels."
"I don't know, Sariel. But it's like little girl crack or something! She adores the fucking thing."
"You're not fucking creeped out by any of this?"
"I got her a sword out of one of Wotan's old model kits, and Abby maker her ride around and stab things. You know, like a nice, normal little girl."
"Are you two ever coming inside? It's three versus two in there, and Uncle and I don't care for the odds." Ganesh stood expectantly on the porch.
"Sariel wanted to play with his magical angel fairy," Raziel grinned.
"Oh, Pretty Pretty Princess!" said Ganesh.
"How do you know about this fucked up magical fairy shit?" Charles asked.
"Oh, we looked into acquiring the company last year," Ganesh told them. "Sixteen billion in revenue."
"What did you say?"
"Fourth quarter fiscal was higher than guidance."
Charles stared at Pretty Pretty Princess, who stared dumbly back.
"Charles, this thing does NOT LOOK BRUTAL."
"Ah, DethPrincess? No, ah, she is, in actuality, quite brutal."
Nathan eyed his manager with great suspicion. He regarded the array of frilly vinyl dolls set up on the conference room table with derision. They wore little pink shirts bearing an even pinker Gear logo, and came with tiny pink glittery copies of the Dethalbum.
"Uh. I could take out my demon wings. Would that make it more, uh, metal?"
"You don't have demon wings. You have ANGEL WINGS."
"Pink isch the least brutal color," Murderface observed. "It is a schientific fact."
"Ams sparkles ams blindsing me!" Skwisgaar complained.
"Look, we, uh, need to speak to our FEMALE FAN BASE."
"Yeh, dood, I have some o' da female fan base in my room right now we could speak to," Pickles snorted.
"Pickles, that's an excellent idea," said Charles
"Wut?"
"Your, er, female guests. Go get them. NOW."
The band exchanged glances, and then Nathan, Skwisgaar and Pickles departed the meeting room, while Toki continued painting his model kit of the Death Star (Return of the Jedi version) and Murderface simply sat and sighed miserably. The three musicians returned in a few minutes, Nathan accompanied by a bevy of willowy swimsuit models, Pickles by some well endowed strippers, and Skwisgaar, last of all, by a rather substantial flock of female humanity of all shapes and sizes. "I takes da times because we ams lined up in da alphagabetical orders," Skwisgaar bragged.
"Pretty Pretty Princess!" squealed one of the strippers, and then suddenly a bevy of female pulchritude was surrounding the now smugly grinning Charles and his own little 1:6 scale plastic harem.
"I used to love these soooo much," cooed a supermodel.
"My granddaughter has every single one," noted a Skwisgirl.
"Do you have the magical Pegasus fairy angel pony too?" tithe stripper inquired hopefully.
"Oh, we ams wants dat," stated Skwisgaar, playing a snotty chord on his Gibson. "But dats guy," he said, pointing his guitar's neck at Charles, "Ams nots let's us!"
"Yeah, Charles, we're gonna have PRETTY PRETTY DETHPRINCESS whether you WANT US TO OR NOT!" Nathan thundered.
Some time later, when most everyone had left the conference room, Nathan, Toki and Charles remained behind.
The conference room table was now strewn with plastic princesses and empty beer bottles.
"I ams gots to gets more greys paints," Toki muttered, hastening out the door, leaving his half painted model behind.
"So, why is she a princess and not a QUEEN?" asked Nathan, "Queens are SOMEWHAT BRUTAL."
"I dunno," admitted Charles, upturning his beer bottle to further investigate where all of the beer had gone. "Oh, hey Kam! Sorry, the meeting ran late."
His angelic tutor, standing expectantly in the doorway, released Elias' hand, and the baby waddled to the conference room table, where, spotting Toki's model, he gasped from sheer awesome and eagerly clambered into a nearby chair to survey its majesty.
"Def Sta!" he said in wonder.
"Now, see, your kid, he knows a BRUTAL TOY when he sees it," Nathan mused.
"Boon!" scolded Charles, examining a brand new beer.
"BOOOO!" said the child, reaching out hubby fingers towards the model.
"That's Toki's toy. You be careful!"
"Dak Syde!" the boy repeated.
Without warning, the model suddenly started to hum, and then shot out a crackling bluish death ray, which arced across the table, zapping each and every one of the Pretty Pretty Princes dolls.
The dolls were left twisted, melted ruins.
"Hey!" said Nathan, picking up the Daliesque remnants of a vinyl fairy princess. "Hey! Actually, these are kinda brutal now!"
"Ald'raan," blurbled Elias.
"It's on DANTOOINE," corrected Nathan.
"Yavin IV," said Charles.
"Oh. Yeah. You're right," noted Nathan, who had scooped up a giggling Elias and was flying him around the room in an exciting X-wing dogfight.
"I'm always right," said Charles.
"What ams happenses to my Deathses Stars," inquired Toki, returning to find his model kit still giving off steam.
"Apparently, it was fully operational all along," said Charles, rising to leave.
"Yeah, the Emperor is one SNEAKY BASTARD," noted Nathan as they all departed for a galaxy far far away.
Author: tikistitch
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Kids and toys
Warnings: Slash, AU, OCs, swearing, lots and lots and lots of pink. With sparklies!
Notes: I dunno, have you been to the little girls toy aisle lately?
"BOOOOOO!" howled Abby.
The squealing dark-haired girl tackled Elias with a monstrous hug. However, thanks to both extended wings and two sets of arms flapping, the small boy managed to remain more or less standing under the assault. And then he recovered himself enough to favor his intended bride (well, in a decade or two) with a rather gooey kiss.
"Ewwwwww!" commented Raziel, Abby's mother.
Liam, Abby's fair haired twin brother, merely giggled at the stupidity of his young playmates. He had cleverly run directly to Uncle Ganesh, who inevitably lifted him upside-down. And, as all know who are of a certain age, upside down is totally awesome.
"Sariel, you know if they mix their angel baby germs, you'll probably get MUTANT angel baby germs!" Raziel, a student of biochemistry, explained.
"It's her fault!" Charles protested. "Your spawn is a wanton woman!"
"Come along," boomed Wotan, scooping up the young lovers, one in each arm. "I'm hungry as hell, and we've got fresh Vritra meat on the grill. And vegetarian lasagna," he noted, eying Ganesh.
"Oh! Made with that cream sauce?" Ganesh inquired as they packed several squirming children inside.
Charles, who was chronically peckish, but no fan of legendary monster snake meat, broiled or otherwise, paused for a moment to stoop over and pick up his son's beloved elephant plush toy, cruelly abandoned in the melee caused by his evil niece. He glanced at Abby's toy, which also lay forgotten on the ground. Curious, he carefully gripped it between thumb and forefinger, as one might hold a smallpox-infected blanket.
"What is this thing anyway?" he asked Raziel, who stood watching.
"Pretty Pretty Princess? Oh, gods, it's horrible. Abby won't go anywhere without it."
"But, what is it?"
"It's a princess fairly angel ... uh, ballet dancer. I think."
"It's so .... pink!"
"Yeah."
"What's the point?"
"Well, she has a magical pastel rainbow Pegasus pony...."
"Wait! The fucking pony flies too? I thought she was a fucking fairy?"
"A fairy angel. A magical fairy angel."
"Yeah, I guess it would fucking suck to be one of those non-magical fairy angels."
"I don't know, Sariel. But it's like little girl crack or something! She adores the fucking thing."
"You're not fucking creeped out by any of this?"
"I got her a sword out of one of Wotan's old model kits, and Abby maker her ride around and stab things. You know, like a nice, normal little girl."
"Are you two ever coming inside? It's three versus two in there, and Uncle and I don't care for the odds." Ganesh stood expectantly on the porch.
"Sariel wanted to play with his magical angel fairy," Raziel grinned.
"Oh, Pretty Pretty Princess!" said Ganesh.
"How do you know about this fucked up magical fairy shit?" Charles asked.
"Oh, we looked into acquiring the company last year," Ganesh told them. "Sixteen billion in revenue."
"What did you say?"
"Fourth quarter fiscal was higher than guidance."
Charles stared at Pretty Pretty Princess, who stared dumbly back.
"Charles, this thing does NOT LOOK BRUTAL."
"Ah, DethPrincess? No, ah, she is, in actuality, quite brutal."
Nathan eyed his manager with great suspicion. He regarded the array of frilly vinyl dolls set up on the conference room table with derision. They wore little pink shirts bearing an even pinker Gear logo, and came with tiny pink glittery copies of the Dethalbum.
"Uh. I could take out my demon wings. Would that make it more, uh, metal?"
"You don't have demon wings. You have ANGEL WINGS."
"Pink isch the least brutal color," Murderface observed. "It is a schientific fact."
"Ams sparkles ams blindsing me!" Skwisgaar complained.
"Look, we, uh, need to speak to our FEMALE FAN BASE."
"Yeh, dood, I have some o' da female fan base in my room right now we could speak to," Pickles snorted.
"Pickles, that's an excellent idea," said Charles
"Wut?"
"Your, er, female guests. Go get them. NOW."
The band exchanged glances, and then Nathan, Skwisgaar and Pickles departed the meeting room, while Toki continued painting his model kit of the Death Star (Return of the Jedi version) and Murderface simply sat and sighed miserably. The three musicians returned in a few minutes, Nathan accompanied by a bevy of willowy swimsuit models, Pickles by some well endowed strippers, and Skwisgaar, last of all, by a rather substantial flock of female humanity of all shapes and sizes. "I takes da times because we ams lined up in da alphagabetical orders," Skwisgaar bragged.
"Pretty Pretty Princess!" squealed one of the strippers, and then suddenly a bevy of female pulchritude was surrounding the now smugly grinning Charles and his own little 1:6 scale plastic harem.
"I used to love these soooo much," cooed a supermodel.
"My granddaughter has every single one," noted a Skwisgirl.
"Do you have the magical Pegasus fairy angel pony too?" tithe stripper inquired hopefully.
"Oh, we ams wants dat," stated Skwisgaar, playing a snotty chord on his Gibson. "But dats guy," he said, pointing his guitar's neck at Charles, "Ams nots let's us!"
"Yeah, Charles, we're gonna have PRETTY PRETTY DETHPRINCESS whether you WANT US TO OR NOT!" Nathan thundered.
Some time later, when most everyone had left the conference room, Nathan, Toki and Charles remained behind.
The conference room table was now strewn with plastic princesses and empty beer bottles.
"I ams gots to gets more greys paints," Toki muttered, hastening out the door, leaving his half painted model behind.
"So, why is she a princess and not a QUEEN?" asked Nathan, "Queens are SOMEWHAT BRUTAL."
"I dunno," admitted Charles, upturning his beer bottle to further investigate where all of the beer had gone. "Oh, hey Kam! Sorry, the meeting ran late."
His angelic tutor, standing expectantly in the doorway, released Elias' hand, and the baby waddled to the conference room table, where, spotting Toki's model, he gasped from sheer awesome and eagerly clambered into a nearby chair to survey its majesty.
"Def Sta!" he said in wonder.
"Now, see, your kid, he knows a BRUTAL TOY when he sees it," Nathan mused.
"Boon!" scolded Charles, examining a brand new beer.
"BOOOO!" said the child, reaching out hubby fingers towards the model.
"That's Toki's toy. You be careful!"
"Dak Syde!" the boy repeated.
Without warning, the model suddenly started to hum, and then shot out a crackling bluish death ray, which arced across the table, zapping each and every one of the Pretty Pretty Princes dolls.
The dolls were left twisted, melted ruins.
"Hey!" said Nathan, picking up the Daliesque remnants of a vinyl fairy princess. "Hey! Actually, these are kinda brutal now!"
"Ald'raan," blurbled Elias.
"It's on DANTOOINE," corrected Nathan.
"Yavin IV," said Charles.
"Oh. Yeah. You're right," noted Nathan, who had scooped up a giggling Elias and was flying him around the room in an exciting X-wing dogfight.
"I'm always right," said Charles.
"What ams happenses to my Deathses Stars," inquired Toki, returning to find his model kit still giving off steam.
"Apparently, it was fully operational all along," said Charles, rising to leave.
"Yeah, the Emperor is one SNEAKY BASTARD," noted Nathan as they all departed for a galaxy far far away.
