Hot (Mythklok Interstitial)
Jan. 27th, 2011 09:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tikificTitle: Hot (Mythklok Interstitial)
Author: tikistitch
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Everybody ends up in bed together!
Warnings: Slash, AU, OCs, swearing
Notes: This one is complete nonsense. And just so this is clear, this story happens a few days prior to events recounted in Chapter 27. Also, ONLY GIRLS care about who's your first or second best friend, but this is a fantasy.
Sariel sat miserably on Ganesh's bed. He had been some days recovering from pneumonia, and even though his lungs were no longer making a distressing sound when he breathed in and out, he was growing bored of his enforced bed rest.
His mood was not helped by Queen Raziel. She had come to sit with him while Lord Gamesh attended to an emergency at the Imperial City. So, after briefly retiring to the washroom to vomit up her last few meals (as jumping from place to place made her nauseous) she had quickly launched into what she clearly felt was an amusing occupation, leafing through a stack of Hello! magazines to determine which suits worn by the human actor George Clooney would make her husband, King Wotan, appear "hot."
"And what about this one?" she was asking.
"Yeah."
"You don't think the lapels are too wide?"
"No."
"YOU'RE NOT EVEN LOOKING."
"Would it even matter?"
"Well, actually, no. You have absolutely no taste. And quit sighing! I've told you Lord Ganesh won't be back for a while. He needs to go destroy a thingie. Or something."
"I was just thinking. What's happened to my life?"
"Waddya mean?"
"I mean, Ganesh is now Lord of Destruction!"
"Acting," corrected Raziel.
"And you're the fucking queen! But me, I can't even get outta bed!"
"Tsk," tutted Raziel, hopping up on the bed next to him. "Glass half empty!"
"What?"
"Well, look at it this way: your boyfriend is Lord of Destruction, and your best friend is Queen!"
"Oh, god no, Raziel! Please! Tell me you are not my best friend?"
"Can you name a better friend? Can you name any friends? I mean, any at all?"
"I thought this was supposed to make me feel better!"
"Namaste Ganesha!" trilled Raziel. "You're home early!"
"Sigh! So little time, so much to destroy!" sighed the god. "How is our patient?"
"He's tired of playing the George Clooney suit game with me!"
"Oh, I never tire of that game," Ganesh enthused, jumping onto the bed and snapping up an issue of Hello! "This one looks especially hot."
"Cool. You can be my new best friend," Raziel told him.
"Oh, but I thought my mother was your best friend?" Ganesh wondered.
"OK, you can be my second best friend."
"Wait, I thought I was your best friend!" wailed Sariel.
"You didn't wanna be my best friend!"
"You can't demote me when I'm sick!"
"Who says?"
"And we've established that she wasn't your best friend anyway," Ganesh told him, still leafing through Hello!
"Hey Pickles! Do you wanna be my third best friend?"
"Hey, sure dood!" agreed the drummer, who had just appeared in the bedroom. He invited himself up on the bed.
"Help me look for hot suits!" she said, handing him a magazine.
"Third best friend? Where does that leave me?" Sariel grumbled.
"Hey, here's a good one," Pickles commented. "It's dat Inception dood?"
"Leo?" asked Raziel.
"No, it's dat Joseph Gordon-Levitt dood."
Suddenly, three people had tackled Pickles, trying to wrest the magazine from his surprisingly stubborn grasp.
"Hey! It's my magazine!" Raziel whined.
"I found da picture!" Pickles grunted.
"This is my house!" Ganesh insisted.
"I'm sick!" Sariel yelled.
"I'm pregnant!" Raziel countered.
"RAZIEL!"
Everyone suddenly froze and looked up at the familiar voice.
"Might I ask what ye think you're doing?" asked Wotan, who was now standing at the foot of the bed.
"They're trying to take away my picture of Joseph Gordon-Levitt!" Raziel wailed, holding up the torn magazine. "He's wearing a super hot suit."
"Well, I was bringing ye some dinner," Wotan told them, holding up a cooler, "but not if you're all gonna fight!"
"Are there steak sandwiches in there?" Sariel wondered dreamily.
Wotan extended a hand, and Raziel handed over the offending magazine. He opened the cooler. "All right, then. I had cook make up some cheese sandwiches for you Ganesh, and a plain chicken that won't upset my Lady's delicate stomach...."
Sariel sat, back under the covers once again, leafing through a Hello! magazine.
Raziel sat in a chair, her feet up on the bed, Hello! magazine spread open on her lap, picking a bit of chicken from between her teeth.
"Here's one," said Sariel.
"Who is it?"
"Chris Cornell."
"Is he wearing a hot suit?"
"He's actually not wearing much of anything," Sariel grinned.
Raziel made to move, but Sariel was already holding the picture as if he was going go tear it in two.
"All right, what do you want?" Raziel asked.
"Back to first best friend?"
She glared at him, and then shrugged. "OK, deal." She hopped up on the bed so they could both appreciate Chris Cornell in his natural state.
Sariel sighed. "What has happened with my life?" he asked.
"You have a picture of Chris Cornell," she said, continuing to leaf through the magazine.
"Well. Huh. That's true."
"That one looks hot!" she said, pointing out a suit.
"Yeah, but the lapels are too wide."
Raziel peered at the photo. She looked at Sariel. "Hey, I think you're right."
"Listen. And learn," Sariel told her.
"But would it make Wotan look hot?" she mused.
Sariel narrowed his eyes. "Would it make Chris Cornell look hot?"
Raziel arched an eyebrow.
They leafed back a few pages to make a thorough assessment.
Author: tikistitch
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Everybody ends up in bed together!
Warnings: Slash, AU, OCs, swearing
Notes: This one is complete nonsense. And just so this is clear, this story happens a few days prior to events recounted in Chapter 27. Also, ONLY GIRLS care about who's your first or second best friend, but this is a fantasy.
Sariel sat miserably on Ganesh's bed. He had been some days recovering from pneumonia, and even though his lungs were no longer making a distressing sound when he breathed in and out, he was growing bored of his enforced bed rest.
His mood was not helped by Queen Raziel. She had come to sit with him while Lord Gamesh attended to an emergency at the Imperial City. So, after briefly retiring to the washroom to vomit up her last few meals (as jumping from place to place made her nauseous) she had quickly launched into what she clearly felt was an amusing occupation, leafing through a stack of Hello! magazines to determine which suits worn by the human actor George Clooney would make her husband, King Wotan, appear "hot."
"And what about this one?" she was asking.
"Yeah."
"You don't think the lapels are too wide?"
"No."
"YOU'RE NOT EVEN LOOKING."
"Would it even matter?"
"Well, actually, no. You have absolutely no taste. And quit sighing! I've told you Lord Ganesh won't be back for a while. He needs to go destroy a thingie. Or something."
"I was just thinking. What's happened to my life?"
"Waddya mean?"
"I mean, Ganesh is now Lord of Destruction!"
"Acting," corrected Raziel.
"And you're the fucking queen! But me, I can't even get outta bed!"
"Tsk," tutted Raziel, hopping up on the bed next to him. "Glass half empty!"
"What?"
"Well, look at it this way: your boyfriend is Lord of Destruction, and your best friend is Queen!"
"Oh, god no, Raziel! Please! Tell me you are not my best friend?"
"Can you name a better friend? Can you name any friends? I mean, any at all?"
"I thought this was supposed to make me feel better!"
"Namaste Ganesha!" trilled Raziel. "You're home early!"
"Sigh! So little time, so much to destroy!" sighed the god. "How is our patient?"
"He's tired of playing the George Clooney suit game with me!"
"Oh, I never tire of that game," Ganesh enthused, jumping onto the bed and snapping up an issue of Hello! "This one looks especially hot."
"Cool. You can be my new best friend," Raziel told him.
"Oh, but I thought my mother was your best friend?" Ganesh wondered.
"OK, you can be my second best friend."
"Wait, I thought I was your best friend!" wailed Sariel.
"You didn't wanna be my best friend!"
"You can't demote me when I'm sick!"
"Who says?"
"And we've established that she wasn't your best friend anyway," Ganesh told him, still leafing through Hello!
"Hey Pickles! Do you wanna be my third best friend?"
"Hey, sure dood!" agreed the drummer, who had just appeared in the bedroom. He invited himself up on the bed.
"Help me look for hot suits!" she said, handing him a magazine.
"Third best friend? Where does that leave me?" Sariel grumbled.
"Hey, here's a good one," Pickles commented. "It's dat Inception dood?"
"Leo?" asked Raziel.
"No, it's dat Joseph Gordon-Levitt dood."
Suddenly, three people had tackled Pickles, trying to wrest the magazine from his surprisingly stubborn grasp.
"Hey! It's my magazine!" Raziel whined.
"I found da picture!" Pickles grunted.
"This is my house!" Ganesh insisted.
"I'm sick!" Sariel yelled.
"I'm pregnant!" Raziel countered.
"RAZIEL!"
Everyone suddenly froze and looked up at the familiar voice.
"Might I ask what ye think you're doing?" asked Wotan, who was now standing at the foot of the bed.
"They're trying to take away my picture of Joseph Gordon-Levitt!" Raziel wailed, holding up the torn magazine. "He's wearing a super hot suit."
"Well, I was bringing ye some dinner," Wotan told them, holding up a cooler, "but not if you're all gonna fight!"
"Are there steak sandwiches in there?" Sariel wondered dreamily.
Wotan extended a hand, and Raziel handed over the offending magazine. He opened the cooler. "All right, then. I had cook make up some cheese sandwiches for you Ganesh, and a plain chicken that won't upset my Lady's delicate stomach...."
Sariel sat, back under the covers once again, leafing through a Hello! magazine.
Raziel sat in a chair, her feet up on the bed, Hello! magazine spread open on her lap, picking a bit of chicken from between her teeth.
"Here's one," said Sariel.
"Who is it?"
"Chris Cornell."
"Is he wearing a hot suit?"
"He's actually not wearing much of anything," Sariel grinned.
Raziel made to move, but Sariel was already holding the picture as if he was going go tear it in two.
"All right, what do you want?" Raziel asked.
"Back to first best friend?"
She glared at him, and then shrugged. "OK, deal." She hopped up on the bed so they could both appreciate Chris Cornell in his natural state.
Sariel sighed. "What has happened with my life?" he asked.
"You have a picture of Chris Cornell," she said, continuing to leaf through the magazine.
"Well. Huh. That's true."
"That one looks hot!" she said, pointing out a suit.
"Yeah, but the lapels are too wide."
Raziel peered at the photo. She looked at Sariel. "Hey, I think you're right."
"Listen. And learn," Sariel told her.
"But would it make Wotan look hot?" she mused.
Sariel narrowed his eyes. "Would it make Chris Cornell look hot?"
Raziel arched an eyebrow.
They leafed back a few pages to make a thorough assessment.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 05:49 am (UTC)I'm not a fan of suits, I'm more interested in the sandwiches. Probably because I just remembered that I forgot to eat tonight. (I'm eating toast now though.)
no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 06:18 am (UTC)I don't know offhand - though it's pretty darned easy to get pix of him shirtless. In fact, I think it's harder to find images of him where he's fully dressed.
I had my goodbye party cake for breakfast and lunch.
no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 06:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 07:20 am (UTC)(It's my birthday! Or was until an hour and 20 minutes ago. I'm allowed! Though I might attempt to smooch everyone at random, possibly terrifying moments.)
no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 04:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 06:20 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 06:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 11:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 05:46 pm (UTC)And I've listened to Soundgarden plenty, but I guess I'm not enough of a fan to have seen many pics of Chris Cornell. *googles* Ah, well, erm. Let's just say I see the attraction...
Heh, my brother and I pass pictures back and forth on our phones like that...
no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 07:02 pm (UTC)Re: Chris Cornell, this is kind of an in-joke. You know Brendon directed a Soundgarden video, starring Dethklok & Charles, right? (It's not a very good song, but it's a cool video.) So, I've decided that Soundgarden and their mecha all exist in the Dethklok universe. And, yeah, though I usually like men to be all dressed up in a nice and tie, Chris Cornell is one of my very few exceptions.
no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 08:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 06:53 pm (UTC)Chris Cornell in his natural state
...This might have more to do with not having been awake terribly long, but I find myself suddenly imagining an old-fashioned nature documentary, only about Chris Cornell.
no subject
Date: 2011-01-28 07:03 pm (UTC)