Wings, dammit
Oct. 30th, 2011 08:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tikificI wrote this to amuse Z. And because she felt sorry for Nathan.
They were black.
Blacker than the blackest black, really.
Times infinity.
Nathan approved.
He experimentally extended a wing tip. "So, how do you make these-"
He halted, frozen at the sound of his own voice.
He did not approve.
Nathan Explosion ... sounded like ... A GIRL!
"Why are we KIDS again?" he squeaked.
"Well, Nathan," said kid!Charles, standing beside him, "you have a pair of DEMON WINGS."
"Which are AWESOME!" Nathan tried to growl, but instead, he may as well have said they were "KEEN." Or even "NIFTY." Oh, the pain! Was this why he hadn't spoken much until he was eighteen or so?
"Yes, because, as demons, unlike angels, fly by physical means, and not by magically controlling their body weight, as angels do...."
"All that weird WALKING ON THE CEILING SHIT!" Nathan added. That shit was weird.
"Raziel and I thought it would be simpler. For you to, uh, fly. That is," Charles awkwardly explained.
"Huh," said Nathan. His voice was shit, so he tried a glower. He figured that still worked at least.
"And we are children as it is easier to manage.... That is.... A smaller body.... As opposed.... Uh...."
"I really let myself go huh?" Nathan grumbled shrilly.
"I didn't say that!" Charles insisted.
"Huh. So," said Nathan, looking at the wings again. This was fucked, but you gotta admit, they were pretty badass. He looked like a giant bat. He wondered if maybe he was rabid? "Anyway, how do these fuckers work?"
"Well, you, uh, FLAP!" explained Charles.
Nathan raised an eyebrow at his tiny manager. It was weird that the guy had blue eyes. Silver, green, blue? Like, couldn't he decide or something? Maybe he was a fucking unicorn or some shit. Or something from one of Toki's weird ass dreams.
"You flap?"
"Raziel," said Charles, finally turning to the little batgirl next to him, who had been grinning the whole time. He didn't really think it was possible to make Raziel any smaller, but they did it somehow.
"Raziel," said Charles. "How do you fly?"
"LIke THIS!" she grinned, taking wing.
"Uh. Yeah. Like that," explained Charles.
"You realized you really suck, right dude?" said Nathan.
"Uh, yeah, probably."
"Is there a reason Raziel is even smaller than you?"
"Oh, we used this trick in another dream, so it was easy to use it again."
The two boys watched Raziel fly for a time.
"She's kind of CUTE as a little kid," Nathan noted.
"Yeah, I think she looks like Abby," said Charles.
"Oh, yeah, you're right."
"All right, schtand back! The exschpert has just entered the room!"
"Oh, hello, William!" Demon!Murderface was blacker than the blackest black, times infinity, plus with two shiny yellow eyes. "Yes, would you favor us with, ah, a demonstration?"
Nathan scowled. He wasn't sure he was prepared for Murderface to be more accomplished than he at anything, especially doing cool demon shit. Even if he did kind of happen to be a demon. That was just luck!
"Schertainly! You juscht flap...." he began, but stopped suddenly, as his wings appeared to get tangled in one another.
"CHARLESCH!" he shouted.
"What the hell is going on here?" asked Raziel, who had just gracefully alit.
"Uh, I think we need...." said Charles, as he and Raziel slowly un-pretzeled Murderface.
"All right!" said Murderface, at length getting up and dusting himself off. "OK. Schometimes thisch happensch. it'sch all part of the learning processch." He stepped back and flapped out the wings. Raziel and Charles exchanged a dubious glance.
"Here we go!" said Murderface, launching himself into the sky, swirling around furiously for a long minute, and then executing a crazy pinwheeling somersault, and landing back on terra firma.
"Ow my assch!" wailed the bassist.
"I'm impressed!" said Raziel.
"I guarded graveschites! I didn't do flying schit!" wailed Murderface.
"Uh, Charles, dude," whispered Nathan, pulling his kid manager aside.
"Yeah?"
"I've been thinking!"
"OK. I certainly hope you didn't injure yourself."
"Maybe the point of the wings, is to stand and look REALLY BADASS!"
"You might have a point Nathan. Wanna try that?"
"Yeah!"
And so they stood on a cliffside, wings flapping dramatically in the wind, and enjoyed a terrific sunset to the distant sound of Toki's AutoTune singing.
"Hey, whose dream was this anyway?" asked Nathan.
"Nominally, Pickles'."
"Oh."
"But sometimes these things get a little confused," Charles explained.
"Is that why the My Little Ponies galloping by?"
"Yeah, probably. You know that fandom now has a significant male following!"
"No, I guess I didn't know that," allowed Nathan. "Probably because IT WOULDN'T FIT IN MY BRAIN."
"You wanna stand and look dramatic?"
"Yeah, let's do that."
And so they did.
They were black.
Blacker than the blackest black, really.
Times infinity.
Nathan approved.
He experimentally extended a wing tip. "So, how do you make these-"
He halted, frozen at the sound of his own voice.
He did not approve.
Nathan Explosion ... sounded like ... A GIRL!
"Why are we KIDS again?" he squeaked.
"Well, Nathan," said kid!Charles, standing beside him, "you have a pair of DEMON WINGS."
"Which are AWESOME!" Nathan tried to growl, but instead, he may as well have said they were "KEEN." Or even "NIFTY." Oh, the pain! Was this why he hadn't spoken much until he was eighteen or so?
"Yes, because, as demons, unlike angels, fly by physical means, and not by magically controlling their body weight, as angels do...."
"All that weird WALKING ON THE CEILING SHIT!" Nathan added. That shit was weird.
"Raziel and I thought it would be simpler. For you to, uh, fly. That is," Charles awkwardly explained.
"Huh," said Nathan. His voice was shit, so he tried a glower. He figured that still worked at least.
"And we are children as it is easier to manage.... That is.... A smaller body.... As opposed.... Uh...."
"I really let myself go huh?" Nathan grumbled shrilly.
"I didn't say that!" Charles insisted.
"Huh. So," said Nathan, looking at the wings again. This was fucked, but you gotta admit, they were pretty badass. He looked like a giant bat. He wondered if maybe he was rabid? "Anyway, how do these fuckers work?"
"Well, you, uh, FLAP!" explained Charles.
Nathan raised an eyebrow at his tiny manager. It was weird that the guy had blue eyes. Silver, green, blue? Like, couldn't he decide or something? Maybe he was a fucking unicorn or some shit. Or something from one of Toki's weird ass dreams.
"You flap?"
"Raziel," said Charles, finally turning to the little batgirl next to him, who had been grinning the whole time. He didn't really think it was possible to make Raziel any smaller, but they did it somehow.
"Raziel," said Charles. "How do you fly?"
"LIke THIS!" she grinned, taking wing.
"Uh. Yeah. Like that," explained Charles.
"You realized you really suck, right dude?" said Nathan.
"Uh, yeah, probably."
"Is there a reason Raziel is even smaller than you?"
"Oh, we used this trick in another dream, so it was easy to use it again."
The two boys watched Raziel fly for a time.
"She's kind of CUTE as a little kid," Nathan noted.
"Yeah, I think she looks like Abby," said Charles.
"Oh, yeah, you're right."
"All right, schtand back! The exschpert has just entered the room!"
"Oh, hello, William!" Demon!Murderface was blacker than the blackest black, times infinity, plus with two shiny yellow eyes. "Yes, would you favor us with, ah, a demonstration?"
Nathan scowled. He wasn't sure he was prepared for Murderface to be more accomplished than he at anything, especially doing cool demon shit. Even if he did kind of happen to be a demon. That was just luck!
"Schertainly! You juscht flap...." he began, but stopped suddenly, as his wings appeared to get tangled in one another.
"CHARLESCH!" he shouted.
"What the hell is going on here?" asked Raziel, who had just gracefully alit.
"Uh, I think we need...." said Charles, as he and Raziel slowly un-pretzeled Murderface.
"All right!" said Murderface, at length getting up and dusting himself off. "OK. Schometimes thisch happensch. it'sch all part of the learning processch." He stepped back and flapped out the wings. Raziel and Charles exchanged a dubious glance.
"Here we go!" said Murderface, launching himself into the sky, swirling around furiously for a long minute, and then executing a crazy pinwheeling somersault, and landing back on terra firma.
"Ow my assch!" wailed the bassist.
"I'm impressed!" said Raziel.
"I guarded graveschites! I didn't do flying schit!" wailed Murderface.
"Uh, Charles, dude," whispered Nathan, pulling his kid manager aside.
"Yeah?"
"I've been thinking!"
"OK. I certainly hope you didn't injure yourself."
"Maybe the point of the wings, is to stand and look REALLY BADASS!"
"You might have a point Nathan. Wanna try that?"
"Yeah!"
And so they stood on a cliffside, wings flapping dramatically in the wind, and enjoyed a terrific sunset to the distant sound of Toki's AutoTune singing.
"Hey, whose dream was this anyway?" asked Nathan.
"Nominally, Pickles'."
"Oh."
"But sometimes these things get a little confused," Charles explained.
"Is that why the My Little Ponies galloping by?"
"Yeah, probably. You know that fandom now has a significant male following!"
"No, I guess I didn't know that," allowed Nathan. "Probably because IT WOULDN'T FIT IN MY BRAIN."
"You wanna stand and look dramatic?"
"Yeah, let's do that."
And so they did.
