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Ganesha drawing Sariel, by [livejournal.com profile] zsomeone.

Here are all the Mythklok chapters in order. There are also some shorter pieces, which I've tagged "Mythklok Interstitials." Those are bits I started writing when I got blocked on the latest chapter. I consider them canon too, 'cause it's my universe, but, you know, it's up to you whether you want to read 'em. Some are complete barking nonsense (especially when Raziel gets to narrate) but some of the later ones have grown more serious. I've included a few of them in the index if I feel they add to the main story or if I'm particularly fond of them. Others can be found with the tag.

Chapter 1, Collegiality
An old and quite malicious acquaintance from Charles' past shows up at Mordhaus.
Chapter 2, The Wild Hunt
Skwisgaar and Charles visit Valhalla, and Charles learns another face from his past has made herself at home there.
Chapter 3, Nathan the Destroyer
Nathan and Skwisgaar visit Asgard and enjoy tasty demon BBQ.
Chapter 4, Ski Niflheim
Dethklok visits Asgard and enjoys their winter sports, including slaying ice demons.
Part 1 Part 2
Chapter 5, Fashion Week
Lady Raziel attends the Dolce and Gabbana show, and also duels an archangel.

Chapter 6, The Lady and the Tiger
Lady Parvati visits Valhalla, and everyone else runs around slaying demons again.
Part 1 Part 2
Chapter 7, Live and in Concert
As it says on the tin, Dethklok in concert.
Interstitial, Rashomon
Points of view. As told by Raziel and others.
Chapter 8, An Official Inquiry
A tribunal by Michael inquiring into the death of an archangel swiftly degenerates into a monkey trial. With real monkeys.
Chapter 9, The Tower
Lots of angst, and an argument.
Chapter 10, Vighnesha, Vighneshvara
Lord Ganesh, Remover of Obstacles, deals with a troublesome stray cat.
The Underworld Arc
To Hell and back.
Chapter 11, Falling Down
Interstitial, Everybody Comes to Sariel's
Chapter 12, Fellowship
Chapter 13, Little Wing
Interstitial, Rosebud
Movie night.
Interstitial, Scars
Dealing with the past
Chapter 14, Lost Horizon
IKEA lamps, tigers, and a knitting circle.
Interstitial, Quiet
A medical mystery.
Interstitial, Cause and Effect
Karma karma karma.
The Southwest Arc
Kachina and a chase
Chapter 15, Stormy Weather
Chapter 16, Truth
Chapter 17, Consequences
Part 1 Part 2
Interstitial, The Rainbow Ponies of Evil
Magical toddlers run riot.
Interstitial, Visions of Sugarplums
Wotan's Yule ball and visions of Twinkies.
Chapter 18, The Sons of Odin
A dinner party in the Dreamtime
Interstitial, Wings
Stealing pencils.
Chapter 19, Hell's Caterers
Wedding preparations and Satan.
Chapter 20, You Are Cordially Invited
A wedding
Part 1 Part 2
The Volcano Arc
A murder, a war, and revenge
Chapter 21, The L Word
Chapter 22, A Tear in the Universe
Chapter 23, Angels Watching Over
Chapter 24, Under the Volcano
Chapter 25, Shards
Chapter 26, Embers
Interstitial, The L Word (Revisited)
Interstitial, Tusk
Regarding elephants.
Chapter 27, Negotiation
Recuperation and management.
Chapter 28, A Family Affair
Slow dancing and teen hijinks.
Interstitial, Hands
How to fix a dry martini.
Chapter 29, The Sacred Lotus
Angels and Onions.
Interstitial, Clarence Sends His Regards
It's a wonderful AU.
Chapter 30, Library Card
Great books, and some origin stories.
Chapter 31, Scary Monsters
Regarding the misshapen.
Chapter 32, Anatomy Lesson
Angel wings.
Chapter 33, Weird Children
Text messaging in the desert.
Part 1 Part 2
The Pie Trilogy (Mythklok Interstitial)
Flakey crust and delicious filling.
Interstitial, 3.14159
Interstitial, Research
Interstitial, Under the Gaydar
Tam's Meringue Song
The Santeria Arc
Yet another universe.
Chapter 34, The Sun King
Chapter 35, See My Friends
Chapter 36, Wish You Were Here
Chapter 37, You Got the Silver
Chapter 38, Substitute
Interstitial, The Babysitter's Club

The Inheritance Arc
Prophecy and shit.
Chapter 39, Blade
Chapter 40, Birth
Chapter 41, Bambini
Chapter XX, Balderdash (An April Fools)
Chapter 42, Baptism
Chapter 43, Boon
Chapter 44, Giant Robot
Kids and toys.
Chapter 45, Trimurti Follies
Daytimes Emmy awards and tie tacks.
Chapter 46, Rings
A battle begins
Interstitial, He Ain't Heavy
Weighty matters.
Interstitial, Let's Get Kraken
Tentacles and Pickles' Special Blend.
Chapter 47, Nakama
Desu Krokku transform go!


If you want a super quick summary, think Discworld meets Metalocalypse. Only with chainsmoking angels. And, er, gay elephant gods. And, no, I DO NOT THINK FOR ONE SECOND that I am Terry Pratchett. I've just heard this from a couple of people now.

First off, this is a Metalocalypse alternate universe. You don't need to have seen every episode, I think, to get into this, but if you've never seen the cartoon, I suspect you'll be kind of lost. [livejournal.com profile] tiktaalikroseae gets credit for coining the name "Mythklok." The first couple of chapters were written for the Back to Klok Mini Rareathon, courtesy the amazing [livejournal.com profile] supes_. These are what convinced me I have absolutely no business trying to write to prompts. However, it did get me started on something else. And while I am giving credit, [livejournal.com profile] wikdsushi, the world's most awesome beta, provided essential editorial advice on an early "problem child" chapter, and for some reason, continues to read this mess and supply input on knitting-related matters. And also, the CLDK community is super-nice and supportive, especially to brand new writers, so Toki!hugs to them.

In this universe, Charles Ofdensen is a chain smoking Fallen angel who used to go by the name of Sariel. After he was exiled on Earth he spent many centuries trying to forget about his former existence, adopting a series of human names, human manners, and an array of human friends, enemies and lovers. This has been hampered over the years by his old partner in crime, a female Seraph named Raziel. Seraphim are the biggest and baddest of the angels, and, of these, Raziel, who wields the legendary flaming sword, is arguably the most lethal. Raziel had long ago adopted Sariel as a sort of foster brother, and seems reluctant to leave him in peace. But things went rapidly downhill for Charles when another old angel acquaintance showed up at Mordhaus: Uriah, who had adopted the human name, Selatcia. Uriah's idea of happy fun time was torturing Charles, which in turn preoccupied many of the characters in the early chapters.

Another major character you may or may not recognize is Wotan, head of the Norse pantheon, and Skwisgaar Skwigelf's birth father. He has recently been trying to reconnect with his son, although this has been going in fits and starts, as such things will. Wotan lost one of his sons some years back, the god Baldr, and this death still haunts him. Wotan is a pretty modern fellow: he favors cigars, designer three piece suits and single malt Scotch, and he is a wealthy businessman, and an important member of the European Consortium, the largest economy on earth. When the story begins, Wotan is dating the angel Raziel and, against everybody's expectations, the two seem almost nauseatingly happy together.

One of Wotan's oldest friends is his hunting buddy, the Hindu god Shiva, Lord of Destruction, and committed Dethklok fan. Lady Parvati is Shiva's consort, and also a love goddess, which has caused a certain amount of mischief. Lord Ganesh (Shri Ganesha in his native Hindi) is Shiva and Parvati's surprisingly level-headed son, an elephant god who, as the story begins, is also the COO of Shiva's business industry, the Eastern Kingdom, LLC. He is Oxford educated, and thus has a taste for wacky British humor, as well as a rather posh British accent (when he's not too agitated). Beginning with Vighnesha, Vighneshvara, and quite to my surprise, Ganesh becomes increasingly important in the story. Here's an important tip: if you don't think you can live seeing your beloved Metal'pse characters slashed with an OC, probably better to stay away.

We have met a lot of other characters so far, including a few Kachinas from the Hopi pantheon. As it turns out, Native American gods have had a rather tragic history with the angels, but this hasn't kept a few of them, like Spider Grandma and Hon and Kwahu, from helping Charles and Dethklok on occasion. We also encountered Lucifer: he's kind of a douche. Archangel Michael is the head of the Legion, the angel army, as the story begins, though he seems more a self-important bureaucrat than a soldier. The Seraph, Phanuel, is one of Michael's generals, and is twin to Tzaphkiel, a female Seraph. Ganesh's Uncle Brahma (who runs the Hindu heaven) and Auntie Sarasvati have also become frequent guests. Brahma thinks everything is nonsense, but Sarasvati has taken quite a shine to Charles/Sariel, and likes to bake him pies.

I have also tweaked some of the Dethklok characters a bit from canon to fit my whims. For instance, Nathan Explosion is straight, straight, straight. And did I mention, straight? Yeah, sorry, I'm a jerk. Pickles, on the other hand, is rather cheerfully bisexual in this universe. And Toki, as in all my fics, is a Knitting God. And Dick Knubbler is.... Well, you'll have to read it and find out.

A bit about angel politics: the Legion is the angel army, and for many many eons, it was the most powerful force in all of existence. Both Sariel and Raziel were soldiers for the Legion, Raziel even from a time before words. The Seraphim are the front line fighting force in the Legion: in their True Forms, they can be as big as 50 feet tall, with three full sets of wings. At a certain point in time, however, the Creator introduced a new breed of angels, which I've simply termed New Ones. It appears they were never really given a proper name. They seemed to be equally warlike, but perhaps a little more clever than the Seraphim. Lucifer was one of the New Ones, so you can see how well that worked out. Charles is a New One as well, or at least that's what he's been given to understand. He soon teamed up with Raziel, and it is implied that the other angels, and perhaps the Creator himself, were afraid of this fairly murderous pair.

At some point, Raziel was reassigned from the Legion to instead shadow the Creator and help him write his Book of Secrets and Mysteries. She grew to hate the job, and later gave the book away to the Mother and Father of Mankind, after she and Uriah had expelled them from the Garden. Charles, among others, has a copy of the Book in the library at Mordhaus, although most people can't make heads or tails of it, partially because it is written in High Angelic, a language only the most high born angels can understand. It is implied that Wotan may have a copy as well, secreted away somewhere in his jumble of tomes at Valhalla.

A note about angelic Forms, since this seems to be a common area of confusion: in their so-called True Form, angels come in a dizzying array of sizes, from the terrible Seraphim, who are as big as Greyhound buses, to the tiny Putties. So, all of them have adopted roughly human-sized Court Forms, so they can hang out at angel parties together. Court Forms are NOT winged, as wings tend to knock over your knick-knacks. It is actually considered the height of rudeness for angels to appear to one another in winged form. Raziel's True Form, when the story begins, is as a hulking, six-winged Seraph. Sariel's True Form is, by contrast, roughly human sized, and he has only one pair of wings.

As to ratings, this is overall a PG-13, but I don't think it's the kind of thing you'd like to read at your workplace, as the cursing is pretty pervasive. (Since both Sariel and Raziel, the worst offenders, are ex-soldiers, I make no apology for this.) I try to flag individual chapters that contain teh sechs, but if you're looking for something really steamy, this is probably not the place, as I really don't write very good pr0n, and scenes that take place in Lord Ganesh's shower are relatively scarce compared to all the other verbiage.

And just as an additional FYI, I realize this is a lot, so if you have something you're wondering about, I'm not really a "writer," I'm actually a scientist, and I've written a dizzying amount of this on my lunch hour, just to unwind. There are probably only 4 or 5 people who are still bothering to read this thing, so I'm pretty open to people asking me WTF, as long as you're nice about it! (Harsh criticism tends to make me crawl under the couch clutching my Deddy bear.)

In terms of how much longer I'm gonna keep writing: the short answer is, as long as I have at least two or three people still reading. Though, I might even be induced to email chapters if I ever get down to one reader (we're pretty close).
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